Specifically, I have used the term “faggot” to refer to male homosexuals and “dyke” to refer to female homosexuals. On one hand, that is just reclaiming those words. (Specifically dyke which I actually identify as, but also faggot which many call me incorrectly - as in “Not as if there’d be anything wrong with that, but, no, I’m not a faggot”.) On the other hand, those are the terms primarily used on Omegle, and I did use them with scare quotes and everything - and, obviously, they are also direct quotes off the collective Omegle stranger.
I dislike being denounced as “tranny” or “shemale” or “he-she” or “dickgirl” or (worst of all with these implications) “trap” in the same way I dislike being denounced as “dyke” and “faggot”. (Admittedly I might dislike the trans-specific insults more.) In that way, I think
I can truthfully say I can relate. Regardless, I will keep using the terms as I have used them til now. If the tumblr messaging thing works, you’re free to discuss this with me though.
Striking out: Although i have not modified this policy yet, i want to say that the striked-out part here is too ambiguous for my tastes now. So after acknowledging that it was wrong, let me clarify that it was not my intention to set myself up as someone who ‘owns’ the term “faggot” and is therefore most entitled to reclaim it. Considering that it is primarily used against persons perceived as male, and that i do not identify as male while i am less and less perceived as such now, i certainly am not most entitled to reclaim the term.
So you don’t care about my sex life?
i dont care about your sex life stop trying to make me accept you
First, this isn’t just my sex life. There might be things on here that are decidedly about my sex life, but saying that I’m none of “faggot”, “weird”, “perverted male” or “sinner” and that
my body is currently male but won’t stay that way doesn’t seem to be. So, to sum it up: too many of these issues are not about our sex life, and trying to accuse us of flaunting our sex life whenever we speak out for, well, pretty much everything, is a silencing tactic that I do not respond well to.
Second, get a fucking grip. This is Omegle!
Striking out: “Male-bodied” language again. Might add that “flaunting our sex life” is a common silencing tactic not only in cissexist contexts, but at least in heterosexist ones as well.
Just don’t flaunt it
I have nothing against the fact that you’re a transsexual.
What I hate is the fact that you feel the need to tell me.
You know what I hate? How almost everyone tells me all the time about being cis, or implies it. How almost everyone (including a lot of trans people) all the time tries to “pass” for cis. How cis is always assumed the norm unless indicated otherwise.
I have nothing against the fact that you’re cis.
What I hate is the fact that you feel the need to tell me.
You know what, stranger? Fuck you. It’s easy to say something inane like this while you’re in the privileged and by-default-assumed group. People who actually stand up as trans have a reason to do so. (I can only applaud those who are brave enough or forced to be brave enough to do this with their publicly recognizable, in most cases legal, name.) One Omegle question pointing out that we exist is not doing any unjust harm to anyone (cis or trans). If you were truly for inclusion, such a question would not be problematic to you.
And, well, if you only meant to say that you hate me personally for being attention-seeking, I guess I can’t refute that, but you should have made that clear.
Do you find that people are more or less accepting of you when they learn that you identify yourself as lesbian, than they do when they learn that you are transsexual?
Since I in person am currently far from passing as woman, either the outing as lesbian as such or the realization that my (primary) attraction to women is lesbian not heterosexual usually comes after the outing as trans. It usually doesn’t help.
I’ve had a lot of people recently invoke the orientation card; it basically goes like this:
Why are you trans if you’d be lesbian then?
- For the same reasons that you are trans/cis and hetero/homo/pan/a, presumably.
- I see gender identity as distinct from sexual orientation. If sexual orientation was inherent to gender identity, would gay men then be “not real men” and lesbians “not real women”? Maybe. I reject the assertion that it is inherent in that way entirely.
- Suppose we could choose both our gender identities and our sexual orientation more or less freely. Would it then be “clever” to “maximize” my attractiveness by conforming to common heteronormative trends? First, why bother if everyone can adapt, and second, no, I wouldn’t “play the game” of dating and “maximize” my scores, I’d choose to be whoever I’d want to be (if that were possible).
On text mediums such as the internet (the parts that I frequent anyhow) I have as of now experienced that, as might be expected, coming out as an assumedly cis lesbian is more accepted than coming out as an assumedly hetero trans woman. If you combine the two, the intersectionality works out similarly to what you’d expect.
It is funny how often, after one or two lines of quick and pointless insults, a bigoted stranger will disconnect as soon as the other stranger begins typing. This appears as if they’re so insecure in their bigotry, they don’t want to risk seeing an opinion other than their own expressed. And they’re damn right in their fear: there are a lot of good people out there.
My first ASCII Art Spam!
T-Rex with a top hat and monocle!
Don’t worry allies
I wouldn’t do this if I couldn’t cope with all the bullshit people fling at me. If anything, it reinforces my identity to see such inane and irrational nonsense pitted against it.
Newsflash: Insults don’t further any of your points
This after the 30th “dickhead” or so that someone assumed would constitute a coherent reply to me and reasoning for being the things I’m not from my original list. (It is true that sometimes I was called simply nothing but a “dickhead”, which implies it could have been meant only as “someone seeking attention”, but in this particular instance someone actually listed a repetition of the list and then concluded with “dickhead”.)
Am I doing this for drama?
Long answer: I have been repeatedly asked whether I do this just for the attention, or, more specifically, to collect negative attention, hate, disrespectful comments, honest downright trolling, and so on. Many of these questions are invariably framed as accusations, which I just find funny in a way. So, am I doing this for drama? Consult…
Short answer: Yes.
What is this?
This Omegle question is what I started with:
I am a trans woman. That doesn’t make: a “faggot” (try “dyke” because I am), “weird”, a “pervert male”, a “sinner” (and if so, who’d care), and I won’t just “go kill myself” to appease you.
Now that it got too long to keep track of the wrong things people called me, I’ll expand upon their answers here.